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BEDRIDDEN LIFE
Thoughts and Stuff
Or Tweets, let’s be honest
I once texted my sister to ask if she had any family plans for the upcoming weekend. She texted me back, “What do you mean?” I replied, “I dunno.” Then that was the end of the conversation.
It’s 2024. Why are we still calling trash bags, trash bags? This is crude and outrageous. Perhaps we need to change the name to “garbage receivers.”
I changed my username on one of my online accounts to “La Pagina,” which means “the page” in Spanish, because some guy in my high school Spanish class had given me the nickname. He was the only one in my life who ever called me it. I’m pretty sure it’s the only Spanish word he knew. I’ve chosen to honor that.
Imagine if cars, appliances, and certain products you bought were like young kids in that they work horribly in the beginning because they’re so new. “Yeah, this lawnmower I bought works terrible, but give it about five years of use and it should be up to par.”
I think Taylor Swift might be the leader of a benign cult. All fans from babies to grandmas to celebrities to sports figures reported her Eras Tour as being a magical experience. I wonder what goes on there. Dateline should investigate.
