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BEDRIDDEN LIFE
Snacks, Pep Talks, Raking Leaves, & a Side of Bacon
Or Tweets, let’s be honest
While my snacks these days have been relegated to almonds and cashews, bananas, and light popcorn, I have been known, on occasion, to steal my wife and kids’ snacks, and then plead not guilty when confronted by them.
That said, what is the all-time best snack?
I’m gonna go with Doritos.
(Arguments welcome.)
Me giving myself a pep talk:
“There is a ferocious fire burning within you. You want to live, live, live. Do cool things. Make an impact. Practice your craft. In time, you will triumphantly spring up from the ashes and live out your life like you’ve been dreaming.”
Me a minute later:
[Yawns] “Think I’ll take a nap now and eat a family-size bag of Cool Ranch Doritos later.”
Last night, I had a brief flashback to the psych ward when I awoke one night at 3 am to my roommate — who had turned all the lights on in our room — sitting cross-legged on his bed, just staring straight ahead.
Because last night, my son Charlie came into my room twenty minutes after I went to sleep, turned the light on, grabbed my phone, sat in the chair next to…
